yes, i like you. so, now what?

in one of the dive forum sites where i am a regular (of which i have past a thousand posts since i joined in sep06 versus the less than a hundred logged dives- now you go figure that one out) there is a non-diving related discussion among single divers about the double standard between men and women in present times, specifically on the image of girls who sleep with guys they just met right away.

now, i am not so crazy about the whole idea of making a guy sweat his balls off before stopping the pretense of you not being interested in him. although, it is often expected in filipino culture that prospective couples have to pass through that cheesy “courtship” stage (i am not so crazy about that, too). i know a number of girls who made guys wait for ages and ages (and i am talking years here, folks) before they say “yes, you can be my boyfriend now”. i do not know how anybody can wait that long but love comes in various versions and i am not at a liberty to question it.

surprisingly, the discussion was going on one direction. everybody who participated agreed that one cannot judge a girl’s character by how easy you can get her into bed. chemistry, sparks, intimacy, raging hormones, connection, and other shits were mentioned to support that point (e.g. why a girl decides to sleep with you is dependent on this fact and just because she did with you, it doesn’t mean she will do it with the 100 other guys after you.)

apparently, it seems that the guys who think girls who sleep on first dates are easy and are not decent ones didn’t seem to stumble upon the thread. perhaps they did but didn’t care enough to defend their case. that or they were busy getting these girls laid, anyway.

what do i think?

this is my thought: sex is so overrated. i do not understand why women would even be bothered with how some guys viewed their sexual activities. why does it matter? you are not going to have sex all the time. and if you are actually lucky and find yourself still together after couple of years, there’s a whole lot of attitude problems you need to deal with outside the bedroom.

and somebody who thinks along the lines of ‘the harder a man works for a woman, the more likely he is to think she’s worthwhile.’ (to quote one post there) is insane. i am not crazy about making a guy chase after me; if i do not fucking like you i would not give you as much as a glance so shoo and find someone else you can charm. if i like you and you like me, what the hell are we waiting for? life is so short for mind games. if we find out it is not going to work after a while, at least, we didn’t waste time beating around the bush.

men who prefer girls they can chase around are idiots. and girls who made guys they like wait for no valid reasons are stupid. relationships are work in progress and if both of you prefer to waste a considerable amount of time running around chasing each other, your priorities are screwed.

come to think of it, what makes a lot of single people so miserable is because they spent too much time worrying about what other people will think.

why does it matter, really?


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