what mothers do

i honestly do not know how mother survived rearing us all.

my brother has been sick for days. two days ago, i was afraid his upper body is going to separate from his waistline down by just staring at his stomach. i can see that he is losing weight and i can see that he was having a hard time with the on and off fever and the pain he feels everytime he burps.

we had him checked out. the doctor said all his vitals are normal. he did some tests and they came out alright, except that his neutrophil count is outside the normal values. the doctor said it isn’t something to worry about; nothing that an antibiotic cannot addressed.

i always thought it wouldn’t be that worrisome to have my siblings living with me; how worse can it possibly get? i got their university fees covered, got their allowances taken care of, got a nice place for them to stay… what i have not considered was what to do when they are sick or sad or troubled or confused.

it is a hard job: what mothers do. i remember what happened to jesse recently and how i panicked and called mother while i sobbed hysterically over the phone. and she was calm and i was so bad at it.

i am so bad at this. it doesn’t help having a mild case of hypochondria. it doesn’t help either that i am paranoid in nature.

times like this, i just wish mother was around. she would know what to do all the time.


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